I love you.
No, scratch that. I hate you.
Wait, please don’t unfollow me. I didn’t really mean that. I’m sorry. I was…drunk, yeah that’s it. I wasn’t thinking straight. Really, it’s not you…it’s me.
I really do love you…but to be honest, I think I might hate you at the same time.
Social Media is Breaking My Heart
We have been seeing each other casually now for quite some time, but I have to wonder where this is going? I remember the early days of our relationship, when you were just an occasional blog post, or we would slum around together on SixDegrees & Friendster.
Boy, the times sure have changed and you are more popular then ever before. Everyone is talking about you and seems to want a piece of you. Maybe it is out of jealousy, but it hurts to hear my friends and Search colleagues talk about how you “put out” great results when they are with you.
Personally, I don’t like to tweet and tell.
Please don’t take this wrong, but I’ve noticed that you really seem to be getting around lately. Even more so now that you’ve hooked up with iPhones, Droids and Blackberries. I just don’t understand why everyone must constantly “check in” with me and tell me where they are going with you and what you two are up to? I guess deep down inside I really wish some of these Yeeps would keep their yaps shut and stop yelping about you every second of their day.
Maybe I’m just feeling a little left out.
All this popularity seems to be going to your head as you’ve become obsessed with your appearance of late. Never happy with the status quo, you’re constantly going under the design knife. And just when I begin to get comfortable with your new look, you change it up on me all over again.
At first it was just a slight lift to your logo or a tightening up of a column, but now it’s turned into complete redesigns with larger dashboards and more prominent status updates. Your obsession with your looks puts Heidi Montag & Joan Rivers to shame. If it wasn’t for the Wayback Machine, I’d have a hard time remembering how you looked when I first met you.
And don’t even get me started on your new Privacy Policy. Just who are you trying to protect here?
But despite all of this, you really are too valuable to turn my back on. Just when I think you put the “not” into social notworking, you send me valuable articles, interesting takes on current issues and give me the pulse of what’s going on in Search as well as my local scene. You help me to keep LinkedIn with my clients and colleagues, promote new services to potential customers and reward me with some virtual accolades on the rare occasion where I am useful, funny or cool.
But it’s getting to be too much. Every time I use my phone, you are there. Every time I go online, you are there. There are even videos on YouTube giving countless opinions on the best ways to exploit you. You’ve even invaded my X-box!
The more I think about it, the more I think we might need to take a break. Or at least a little more time apart. I don’t think I can see you on the weekends anymore. My wife has started to notice we have been spending more time together while my friends have to talk to me in 140 characters or less just to get my attention.
I guess I’m just no longer Twitterpated with you and no, I don’t want to take your new features out for a Sphinn. Sure, I still want to see you, but from now on it will be on my terms not yours. I’m cautiously optimistic about what the future may hold for us.
So if you are still interested please Facebook me, follow me on Twitter, direct message me, text me, leave a comment on my WordPress blog, check out my pictures on Flickr, see what I’m listening to on LastFM, or even IM me. You can always connect with me on Linked In, find me on Yelp, or status update me and we can talk on Skype. Who knows, you might just StumbleUpon something new about me that you find to be Delicious and worth Yammering about.
Just don’t email me. That’s so 2009.
Do you have a Love/Hate Relationship with Social Media? Feel free share a little of your devotion/aversion with those who can relate. Go on. Its ok.
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